Daily Thoughts

The Elusive Dream

I woke up with a heavy heart. My dreams somehow affected my mood all day. I am completely distracted and annoyed.

The only reason I can think why I have that dream its because of the stupidity I’ve done yesterday. Until today Anday haven’t reply on my message. It doesn’t seem that he already saw the message but one thing is for sure, that he is online an hour ago. 😏 

Yes! So many things playing on my mind. So many thoughts that kills my mood and couldn’t function very well. I tried to engaged with the program where we used to talked but it seems that he is not there. I havent seen anyone talking to him either though my mind saying that he is choosing people who he wants to talk. Bummer!

I know I am not in the position to be mad but I’m feeling a little bit stressed out. Maybe tomorrow will be more better and insteresting..

Sharing my nightmare…

I dreamt about him who is sitting beside my desk and her girlfriend is also there. I was in a impression that they are about to separate. In reality I assumed that they are no longer together. That’s mainly the reason why I dreamt of him. So going back to my dreams the girlfriend is asking Andy if they have time to talk. Andy said “if you want to talk we can talk here” I promise I clearly remember how he looks at his girlfriend. ( worried ) 

The girlfriend said “no honey we can talk later but you know how much I love you right?” Andy just nodded. And I was just pouting my lips and waiting for the news that she is about to break Andy’s heart. I dont know why I am expecting her to say that but I believed thats what I wanted to hear maybe..

After they said that the girlfriend asking Andy to take off his clothes because they need to wear customs. I dont know the reason but she is insisting that Andy needs to do it. Andy said “I dont even like this” — since I was just sitting beside them, I told him “then why are you wearing it if you dont like it?” He just looked at me and didnt say anything.

Then her girlfriend came back dragging Andy in the middle and waving her hands up above. The atmosphere somehow have the feels of having a party. And they walked around the office while smiling. I was so mad that she did not tell Andy that he wants a break-up. I am feeling disappointed of eveything. Felt that my theory is all wrong.

I just woke up with that feeling.. mad and feeling disappointed. Maybe my subconscious telling me that I have to wake up from my this dream.. Stop pretending that is something special will happen between us. Stop wishing things that are not achievable. Stop as in stop right now.

Maybe my subconscious is right, that I dont need to expect things from other people. I must move on. 😦

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